When I was pregnant I took the breastfeeding information session offered by my hospital. I learned about the many health benefits for mom and baby, I practiced holding a baby doll in different breastfeeding positions, and I heard the nurse briefly mention how it helps women bond with their babies. Fast-forward two years and my now toddler is still latched to me many times in a 24 hour period. WHOA. The scientific mumbo jumbo about hormones and cortisol levels did not make it clear to me that this magical act would literally intertwine my physical and emotional needs with my daughter’s. Meaning I can literally heal her not just physically but emotionally too. And in turn, that bond we developed can heal my baby-related emotional needs.

Baby is hungry? Here’s my boob.
Mom or baby in a bad mood? Here’s my boob.
Baby bumped her head? Here’s my boob.
Baby is tired? Here’s my boob.
Mom needs 10 minutes to breathe and rest? Here’s my boob. 
Baby is scared, uncomfortable, mad, or otherwise upset? Here’s my boob. 

I mean really, it’s the closest thing in life to a superpower! 

You know what else they didn’t tell me in that info session?

It’s not always pretty.

Breastfeeding is a complicated, emotional ride. First of all, it can be a struggle to figure out. Most moms experience under supply and/or over supply at some point (myself included). Cracked, bleeding nipples are common in the early weeks (been there). Some moms get mastitis (yep, been there too). Some babies have lip and/or tongue ties. There are social discomforts to work through (#normalizebreastfeeding) and many many hours of worrying. For those who continue, yes you are rewarded with a beautiful bond that can be truly therapeutic for both of you.

But mama, sometimes you’ll wonder if it’s possible for your nipples to fall off!  There will be days that you’re certain your baby cares more about nursing than he does about you. Occasionally you’ll want to scream because you’re so over being constantly touched. You will almost definitely grow tired of thinking about your boobs. If you nurse into toddlerhood, at some point you’ll be smacked, your nose will be picked, your nipple will be bitten and the other one will be twisted. (Quite possibly all in the same session.) 

And throughout it all, if your experience is anything like mine, you’ll be riddled with contradictions. 

“I want my body back” BUT… “I love these moments of calm, quite connection.”

“I’m so exhausted and drained from nursing all day.” BUT… “Nursing at night is the easiest way for us both to get sleep.”

“Ugh. Breastfeeding is supposed to help me lose weight. When will this pooch go away?”  BUT… “My body is badass. It created and is sustaining another human life!”

“I feel like a cow pumping milk.” BUT… “I feel empowered being able to provide for my baby’s needs even when I’m away, providing for my own.”

“I’m so grateful I can help my baby find calm when she’s upset.” BUT…  “Am I holding her back from developing the ability to process her own emotions?”

Or how about my current struggle, “I want another baby but breastfeeding is still suppressing my cycle. Should I start to wean even though I’m still enjoying nursing?” 

Yep. Breastfeeding is like every other aspect of parenting. Challenging and rewarding. So whether you’re in the midst of bliss or currently on the struggle bus, know that you are an incredible mom and the closest thing to a super hero your child will ever know!

You should also know, you’re not alone.

Just because nursing is natural, doesn’t mean it’s easy. I’ve googled and posted in Facebook groups more times than I can count. If you’re struggling, or even just curious about something, reach out! I’m no pro, but I’m happy to connect and share what I do know. I’ve also provided a short list below of resources I’ve found helpful.

Most of my google searches brought me to one of these websites:
https://kellymom.com/
https://www.llli.org/
https://www.who.int/health-topics/breastfeeding#tab=tab_1

I typically go to one of these Facebook groups when I need some solidarity:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/breastbeginnings/
https://www.facebook.com/groups/2023815077893784/
https://www.facebook.com/groups/Feedthebabies/

P.S. Happy World Breastfeeding Week! This year’s theme is “Support Breastfeeding for a Healthier Planet.” Check out this information and join me in supporting all the mamas out there, including mother earth. <3